Things that are two toned are visually interesting. Things that have stripes painted on them are
usually quite sporty. A thing that is
two toned, has three stripes painted
on it, and has a wing on the front is
both bold and fanciful. Such is the case
with the University of Michigan baseball catcher’s helmet.
The merely astute reader will note that Michigan is not in
Florida. However, the knowing reader will calmly clear his
throat, close his eyes and gently shake his head at the merely astute reader
for he is aware that Clearwater, St. Petersburg, and Dunedin played host to the
2012 Big 10 Big East Baseball Challenge this weekend prior. The author was in attendance on opening
night, Friday, at Dunedin’s Florida Auto Exchange Stadium, which is as appealing
to the eye as its name is to the ear. Shining
through the visual blight was the aforementioned thing of two colors, maize and
blue, festooned with three stripes and a wing, slightly modified from the iconic
Michigan football helmet. Dating
back to 1938, the helmet is a striking reminder that the Michigan man who
dons such headgear is marked by smartness in dress, and yet, is rough in
manner, should it come to that, as it frequently does for a man of sporting action.
The dashing headpiece should also remind
you that a Michigan catcher (a) is likely to stir impure thoughts deep within your otherwise
chaste sweetheart should he be given half a chance, and (2) is apathetic
toward your feeble protestations of strike three:
Postscript: Michigan
baseball has a long and hilariously dressed tradition. Regrettably, and as recently as 2009, the
author was known to fashion his hair in a manner not unlike that of the 1886 team. Those scallywags.

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